Today marks ten years since I launched I Need This Unicorn. I intentionally chose this date to honor my mother’s birthday. She would have been 75 today. It’s hard to believe she’s been gone for about 15 years, but this milestone will always be tied to her.
I had planned a big post, logging everything I had been collecting for the past 2 years, and sharing the cool experiences I have been on. I had stopped blogging once my mother-in-law passed and my gallbladder had me go through an emergency surgery in 2024. However, life keeps life-ing! Or in my case, life keeps death-ing. I am currently on 24/7 hospice duty. My father-in-law has been having memory and mobility issues, even before his wife was hospitalized. We thought he may have had a stroke and dementia, but what he has was meningioma, a brain tumor. The very thing my mom dealt with from her 20’s all the way to age 60. I have come to the conclusion that you’re not really supposed to be alive. I’m a nihilist, deal with it.
I Need This Unicorn exists because I needed to find some sort of joy in this cruel, cruel world. What am I good at? Art, makeup, and writing. So I created this blog, to help people make informed purchases when it came to collecting makeup and other experiences. A lot of my content leaned toward fandoms, which I didn’t intend on. It’s one of those things that brings me excitement. Do look forward to that type of content in the future. My original plan was going back to blogging on the regular, but my time is now focused on caring for my father-in-law in his last days. Not to mention the fact I just don’t have it in me.
There are things in life that people need to be more open about to better prepare others for the toll it will take on you. No one tells you the truth about the horrors of pregnancy and childbirth and the death of your parents. They just expect you to deal with it when the times comes. I knew to avoid pregnancy like the plague, but I couldn’t avoid parent deaths! All three deaths have been extremely different. Not one easier than the other. Though a hospital stay miiiight be less traumatizing than changing your own parent’s diaper several times a day.
I started a new website earlier this year. I write about toxic family systems, narcissistic abuse and my past experience with an abusive, controlling relationship. These topics are extremely important and I document my own lived experiences as well as provide resources for those also going through it. It’s a project that I convinced myself was a bad idea. (Mostly due to potential backlash and opening myself for more abuse.) However, after seeing so many people come out with their experiences with abusive people, I felt that it was time for me to share my story. Backlash be damned! People will just have to deal with the consequences of their own actions.
I also want to mention once again because people always seem surprised… my Instagram accounts are deactivated and have been since January 2025. I don’t intend on going back. I am hoping for the next social media platform to launch that isn’t a complete failure.
I do use Tiktok- I have variety content because I simply don’t care about having a niche. I reached a milestone, one video reached 35k views, which is a lot for me since I am usually in 200-jail. I have a more recent one with 10k. Looks like people are interested in Bay Area restaurant content! Well good news, I am interested in eating!
I am also active on Pinterest and last year I reached a milestone of 21 million impressions! It has dropped, but I will bring it back up once I start coming out with regular content again. But for now I don’t have the emotional capacity to start writing.
The 10th Anniversary of I Need This Unicorn celebration post wasn’t at all what I wanted it to be. But I did want to share about my mom. The elementary school she volunteered at, asked if I could make a tribute to her so they could show it at the centennial celebration. So here is what I submitted:
My next post, a reply to your text… everything is up in the air until everything settles. For now, my focus is on my FIL and being here for his end-of-life care. It’s a fucking nightmare, btw. As was my mother’s and MIL’s deaths. All bad, no thanks, Won’t be doing this again. -100/10 Would not recommend.
